He had staked his all on Anna, and lost all; the world, which before
had been so bright, looked very dreary now, while he felt that he
could never again come before his people weighed down with so great a
load of pain and humiliation: for it touched the young man's pride
that, not content to refuse him, Anna had chosen another than herself
as the medium through which her refusal must be conveyed to him. He
did not fancy Mrs. Meredith. He would rather she did not possess his
secret, and it hurt him cruelly to know that she did.
It was a bitter hour for the clergyman, for, strong and clear as was
his faith in God, who doeth all things well, he lost sight of it for a
time, and poor weak human nature cried:
"It's more than I can bear."
But as the mother does not forget her child, even though she passes
from her sight, so God had not forgotten, and the darkness broke at
last--the lips could pray again for strength to bear and faith to do
all that God might require.
"Though He slay me I will trust Him," came like a ray of sunlight
into the rector's mind, and ere the day was over he could say with a
full heart, "Thy will be done."
He was very pale, and his lip quivered occasionally as he thought of
all he had lost, while a blinding headache, induced by strong
excitement, drove him nearly wild with pain.
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